ee. The Train of Thought.
Still
sleepy but wide awake. What just happened? I looked at my notes that I’d just written. I don’t remember writing it; the last part of
the Dear Diary epilogue. The poetic ascent. “Hearing the roar, feeling the
vibrations, fast reflections across the nations. “
The
next line after that was… Was just letters. No words. It made no sense. The
poem? Hearing the roar? Where did those thoughts come from? They weren’t mine. Yet
it’s so strange. I can see those thoughts vividly in my mind. How? The roar. The
words of a dream I never had. A poem I never wrote. It was just too symbolic. It
was too relevant to be just random sleep-written notes.
A vision flashed through my mind. I run as
fast as I can go toward some dense foliage along the cliff. Several spear men discover
me and splinter off from fighting the giant to chase me. I just keep
running.
Rubbing
my eyes and gazing at the bulkhead of the sleeper cabin, I noticed a crack in
the surface. How old is this train? A bug. I focused on a bug. There’s a bug
crawling up there. Not a spider. More like a beetle. A creepy beetle. “If that
beetle drops from up there, loses its grip or something and falls down, it’ll
land right on my face. Creepy. I wonder if they fumigate this train. Ever? This
sleeper cabin is creepy.”
Stay in
the present. The images of that poem linger in my thoughts. Go to sleep. Stay
in the present. Fast reflections across the nations. Stay in the present.
Tomorrow is a long train ride day. Plenty of time to enjoy life. Tomorrow.
I closed
the lid of the laptop and made myself comfortable on the bed again. Settling on
the pillow. That beetle. That beetle is looking at me. That beetle… it’s…
(…this guy has issues.)
1st person
dream.
Dreaming thought transitions. The
beetle. Should I open my eyes? Fast reflections across the nations? My eyes open
not. Sleep idiot. Not my eyes. They open not. My thoughts. The problem is, I
sense something drastic has changed. Should open my eyes? No, count sheep. I no
longer hear the click-click clack of the train wheels gliding down the tracks. Am
I still awake? A loss of hearing. An indication the astral projection is
forming. Or, is this a dream? I feel that familiar gentle rocking motion of the
cabin from the uneven tracks, …or do I? Open not the eyes.
I hear a breeze rustling through
dry leaves. Suddenly uncomfortable. I hear nothing. Itchy all over. I hear
rustling leaves. Like an October wind on dry ground. I am afraid to open my
eyes. That beetle. Not yet. I should feel immune to the environment. Because it
is astral projection. But I don’t feel immune. This is different. Fear should
not be here. However, fight or flight is best with eyes open so, … I open my
eyes. No walls, no bulkhead, no sleeper cabin. No beetle. No train. Only open
air and sky. In a tree. A tree? Fear of
falling; don’t move. It’s windy. How secure is this tree? Rock-a-bye baby… Carefully
peering downward, I see familiar dry brush. Sage brush. That familiar field. I
am looking at literally what I thought I was only dreaming about earlier. Was I
dreaming? Or am I dreaming now? Is the tree real or was the train real? At this
point I’m uncertain what to do. Just what is real and what is dream? Check my
clothes. No pajamas. No train ticket. No laptop. No luggage. No hat. No pajamas?
Wearing, animal skins. Rough. Not even comfortable. Raw animal hide. Not
leather. Not even comfortable. This is not normal. No wonder I am itchy.
The dream ends.
My eyes open not. Then they do. Open. How could I possible
dream of something that has never been invented? If I were to tell this dream
to others, they would not understand. How could they?
Of
course my curiosity is active. I no longer sense the traveling train in my
conscious state. Sometimes I practice remaining completely still. Never moving
a muscle. I focus my mind on not moving. That’s it. Not a tiny bit do I move.
This can send me to a state of astral projection. Where it takes me is the fun
part. I never know. Thankfully I am awake.
It’s
getting dark. The evening song of crickets begin. First one lone chirp, then
gradually three responding chirps. As the night lingers deeper, an entire
chorus of steady rolling chirps. The field below is full of them. It’s windy. Although hungry, I stay in the
tree. If I climb down, where can I go? I can’t fly. Normally I can fly during
astral projection. While looking up through the leaves of the branches’ canopy,
I see millions of stars. More than I’d ever seen before in my life. The sky… So
rich with stars. The night sky lights the earth beneath me. I look for the moon
yet there is no moon to be found. I look across the meadow for that tent-like
structure. Perhaps those aliens are still here, or perhaps those visitors from
other space left it behind. I could look for what’s inside it. I could use it
for shelter or something. I see an empty field where the aliens had been. I
don’t see any structures or tents over there. The aliens are gone.
I
realize I am living in the dream I had earlier. The dream of an open field.
While I slept on the train. The beetle above my head. The dream while
traveling. I have arrived in my dream. Time travel?
I lay
back on this huge branch in the tallest of trees around me. Feeling something
digging at my side. I reach and grab the annoying thing from under the animal hide
that I’m wearing. It’s a stretched piece of dried papyrus. Scratchy. Where did
this come from? There’s writing on it. Primitive letters. It reads, “You were
taken from amongst the children of men, and conducted to the Garden of Eden.
Write down the condemnation and judgment of the world, and all the wickedness
of the children of men.” [1]
Write
down condemnations? How? With what? On what? And who wrote this letter? Who was
it written to? How did I get up here? I was conducted here? This letter is
written for me? What does that mean? What’s even more strange? I was reading the
letter from bottom to top and right to left. That’s not normal but I just did
it naturally. It wasn’t until after I read it that I realized “how” I read it.
And the letters. They’re not letters at all. They’re some form of hieroglyphs.
I will remain
in this tree all night. The eerie sounds are more than just crickets. They’re growls.
I don’t like growls. Growls are bad. Especially at night when I am stuck
outside. There are no fences and I have no weapons for protection against…
whatever is growling down there. This branch is uncomfortable, but at least it’s
safe. Maybe the growls will all go away.
What
happened to the train I was riding? Maybe this is just a dream again. Where’s
my cell phone? I just got bit by an ant. It doesn’t matter. I’m not climbing
down. Not until I can see the ground by day.
[1] Paraphrased
from the Book of Jubilees. Page 38,39. By, London Adam and Charles Black. 1902.